Venezuelan President Nicolás Maduro dances to an electronic remix of him saying, in English, “No crazy war.” Photo: Screenshot: Reuters/YouTube

Welcome back to Monday Barf Bag.

Any fool who believed Donald Trump when he called himself a “peacemaker and unifier” only had 24 hours of peace in 2026 before eating their words. Over the weekend, the president conducted—without congressional approval—a U.S. military operation on a scale not seen since the Cold War, and literally abducted Venezuela’s leader. Apparently, Nicolás Maduro’s dance moves were the last straw… (Meanwhile, just days before, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu was treated to champagne and caviar at Trump’s Mar-a-Lago resort.)

On Friday night, the U.S. deployed thousands of troops and more than 150 military aircraft in what has since been referred to as Operation Absolute Resolve, capturing President Maduro and his wife, Cilia Flores. The plan was reportedly finalized in early December and took two hours and twenty minutes to complete. According to Secretary of State Marco Rubio, Congress wasn’t informed because the mission was more of a “law enforcement operation” rather than military action. (Bullshit.)

And while the move follows months of escalation by the Trump administration, according to the New York Times, which spoke to two sources familiar with the matter, it was Maduro’s dancing that pushed the Trump team over the edge. Last week, after the U.S. struck a dock they claimed was used for drug trafficking and after Maduro rejected a U.S. ultimatum to accept exile in Turkey, he jumped around on state television to an electronic remix of him saying in English, “No crazy war.” The Times reports:

Mr. Maduro’s regular public dancing and other displays of nonchalance in recent weeks helped persuade some on the Trump team that the Venezuelan president was mocking them and trying to call what he believed to be a bluff, according to two of the people, who spoke on condition of anonymity because they were not authorized to talk about the confidential discussions.

So the White House decided to follow through on its military threats.

Maduro also danced publicly in November and early December.

Since early September, the U.S. has conducted at least 35 boat strikes in Venezuela for contested reports of narco-terrorism. (Several victims were actually just everyday people, such as a fisherman who made just $100 a month to provide for his four children.) These strikes were dubbed “Operation Southern Spear” by Secretary of “War” Pete Hegseth in November, and in December, media personality Megyn Kelly fantasized about them being tortured to death, saying, “I’d really like to see them suffer.” Before Maduro’s capture, at least 115 people had been killed in the strikes.

In images from a seemingly makeshift situation room on the night of Maduro’s abduction, Trump is seen posing in deep thought with Hegseth, Rubio, and White House Chief of Staff Stephen Miller. Also present were CIA Director John Ratcliffe and Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Dan Caine. And despite their lame attempts at solemn poses, social media users were quick to realize that the giant screen behind them looked like they just searched “Venezuela” on Twitter and were doomscrolling like the rest of us.

At his Mar-a-Lago resort on Saturday, Trump told Fox News via telephone what it was like to watch the operation. “It was an incredible thing to see…I watched it literally like I was watching a television show. And if you would have seen the speed, the violence? It’s just, it was an amazing thing, an amazing job that these people did.” Awesome.

Maduro’s capture seemed a long time coming, especially given that the president recently admitted the U.S. would be seizing Venezuela’s oil for itself. And while many Venezuelans in the U.S. are relieved that their dictator has been deposed, now, the country is under temporary U.S. control—and we all know how well it goes for everyone when the U.S. takes control of a country for its oil.

More barf:

  • Chaos or not, evil doesn’t rest. Secretary of Homeland Security Kristi Noem said she still plans on deporting people to Venezuela. [Axios]
  • Miami Mayor Eileen Higgins, however, demanded the administration reinstate temporary protected status for Venezuelans, after they ended it in 2025. [NPR]
  • White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt called out New York City First Lady Rama Duwaji for wearing $630 boots at Zohran Mamdani’s mayoral inauguration. The thing is, the boots were loaned and were peanuts compared to Leavitt’s typical wardrobe. [The Daily Beast]
  • Vice President JD Vance’s home was broken into, and a suspect is in custody. None of his eyeliners are reported to have been stolen. [The Hill]
  • Megyn Kelly declared Bari Weiss’s CBS News “dead.” Lmao. [Mediaite]
  • Dan Bongino resigned from his post as FBI Director on Sunday. Everyone wants him to spill the tea. [Raw Story]
  • Elon Musk’s Chatbot, Grok, vowed to implement more safeguards after it came under fire for removing clothing from women’s photos without consent. [Dangerous Minds]

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