I’d like to start with some facts. There was, until some indeterminate time in the last 24 to 48 hours, an Instagram account with the (genuinely) funny name bidness_nonya. As of this morning, it no longer appears active, though a spate of imitators have proliferated, with an extra “s” or an extra underscore (but the same teal-tinted butterfly avatar) to maximize imitation.
This account reportedly left very detailed comments on posts concerning Channing Tatum’s exes, Zoë Kravitz and Jenna Dewan; seemed to remember a lot of details of Tatum’s relationships with them; and also had only one follower (Tatum). This combination of information has led internet users to draw the conclusion that bidness_nonya is nonya other than Tatum’s burner account, which has drawn the attraction of major celebrity gossipmongers, including the dear old Daily Mail, Just Jared, and Metro UK.
I find the argument medium-persuasive given that Tatum is a 46-year-old straight man and I believe that a 46-year-old straight man would not be as sneaky online as he thinks he is, and also because he has a history of using digital communication in hilarious ways. Hunter Harris reminded me of his incredible 2014 email celebrating 21 Jump Street’s box office success—which was leaked in the Sony hack later that year—in which he wrote, “COME ON JUMPSTREETERS WE GOT CATE BLANCHETT WIT DIS BOX OFFICE BITCHES!!!!!!!!” followed by over 30 lines of variation on “AHAHHAHAHA.”
The alleged comments on news about Kravitz—whom Tatum dated for three years (they broke up in October 2024)—and her new fiancé, Harry Styles, are less overtly goofy but still contain an element of gleeful deviousness. Under one photo, whoever is behind the account wrote: “When I see these two I think back at how her former fiancé called her the most intentional person he knows. I wonder how contextual he was being…” When another commenter asked what the hell that meant, bidness_nonya responded, “To me intentional = calculated. He was speaking in terms of film-making but leaning towards her as a person in general too. Now she is constantly spotted with Harry compared to the ex who we heard about long before they were seen together. And when they were seen together it was far less frequent.”
Whether or not this is Tatum, it is really weird to use Styles’ first name and not Tatum’s, but I’ve seen weirder things on the internet, especially from fan accounts.
Digital sleuths are on the case, and I must emphasize that I am not taking a side on whether or not this is him. (Other people are also speculating that bidness_nonya is Tatum’s mom.) Right now it’s just online fun and games amid an otherwise bleak internet environment.
I’ll just leave you with the time, when asked in 2023 about following multiple Kravitz fan accounts, Tatum told Vanity Fair, “I have no chill. I was just seeing what she was up to! Also, I didn’t know anyone would know.”
- Really heartbreaking news: Presley Gerber died at a rehab facility over the weekend. [People]
- Law Roach’s new client is none other than Kim Kardashian. [X]
- Are we witnessing Joe Alwyn’s dating around era? [DeuxMoi/TMZ]
- Ed Sheeran says “all of” his “friends and family” have abandoned him for being complicit in whitewashing genocide (well, he didn’t say that exactly but…). Playing the world’s tiniest violin (on loop) for him. [Page Six]
- Harry Styles owes this woman an apology! [EV Grieve]
