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VioletaStoimenova/Getty ImagesI'm a mom of three kids and live in Wales.My family developed a close relationship with our neighbors, who became like grandparents.Eventually, I had to set boundaries, which caused friction in our relationship.Eleven years ago, we moved into the house next to our new neighbors who were then both 79.Only separated by a narrow alleyway between our two terraced houses, which were built during the first few years of 1900s, my husband and I knew we quickly needed to extend friendship to make our future relationship in such close quarters a positive one.We brought our 1-year-old son around to their house with cookies and always took time to chat when passing outside. She was an English teacher in her working years and couldn't wait to tell me about the newest novel she was reading at the time. He used to be a swimmer, as I am, and we would often have conversations about strokes nearly every time we saw each other.They quickly became friends, and we were grateful to have neighbors we liked and trusted.Our cats became their catsAlong with our growing family, we had two cats, Bonnie and Will, who we both loved and at times were equally frustrated with, as they refused to use the litter tray as we had trained them. We effectively turned them into outside cats, who only came in at night to sleep. In the day, they roamed in the trees behind our house.Our neighbors, avid cat lovers, said the only reason they no longer had a cat was that they didn't want the cat to outlive them. They started welcoming our little felines into their house throughout the day, feeding them chicken scraps and salmon. Needless to say, Bonnie and Will preferred the treatment and quickly made their home next door.We didn't mind, as they didn't have children or extended family, and the cats provided them a bit of company. We got a dog instead.They saw our kids as their grandkidsAs we welcomed two more children into our family, they started to think of us as the children and grandchildren they never had, a beautiful gift, they always said.My husband's grandparents are no longer alive, and I only have one grandmother left, but she lives an ocean away. Our relationship with our neighbors was a taste of what it would have been like to still have our grandparents in the world.They showered all of us with presents at Christmas and birthdays, making sure we had chocolate on Easter and Valentine's Day.As my boys grew, they asked to go next door to watch cartoons while I finished work, sneaking candy from her overflowing jar of sweet surprises just for them.At Christmas, he requested we come in for red wine and mince pieces, a British tradition. On Halloween, they shooed all the other trick-or-treaters away, but phoned me to ask if the boys could ring their doorbell for full-sized bags of chewy candy.We were able to show them love in return by buying them bits of food from the shops when they had forgotten something, doing little DIY jobs they could no longer complete, and purchasing items online that they couldn't find in shops. But they loved it most when we just phoned or popped into their house for a chat — it was company during the endless 24 hours of each day.I struggled with how much I could help themIt was all very wonderful, and then it became quite difficult. Their health started to deteriorate, and I constantly questioned whether I should be doing more for them.At the very end, once she had died, I popped in even more often to see him, left in that house all on his own for the majority of each day. The last time I saw him, unaware he'd die before I'd seen him again, I left thinking, "I did what I could do today."Their deaths triggered so much gratitude and guilt.Gratitude because we had 11 years with beautiful people. My children were loved, and learned how to relate to the older people because of our neighbors. And guilt because I feel like I never did enough for them.Read the original article on Business Insider

Michael Kosnitzky.Courtesy of Michael KosnitzkyJeff Bezos' father hired a CEO to run his fortune — a move now common among the ultra-rich.Half of family offices now have non-family CEOs running their private wealth, according to JPMorgan.The world's richest families are poaching Wall Street bankers to manage their growing fortunes.When Jeff Bezos' father quietly hired a chief executive to manage his fortune in September, the move made headlines.Mike Bezos tapped Valeria Alberola — a former executive for Walmart heir Ben Walton — to lead his Miami-based family office, Aurora Borealis Nezos.The hire is part of a major expansion to manage an estimated $40 billion fortune and support multiple generations of the Bezos family, The Wall Street Journal reported.But to those inside the rarefied world of family offices, the move was anything but surprising."This has been going on for years," Michael Kosnitzky, co-leader of Pillsbury's Private Client & Family Office practice, who advises some of the world's wealthiest families, told Business Insider."Everyone's making a big deal of it now, but we've been parachuted into these situations for a long time," he said, not just to help hire these people, but to design the executive comp programs that keep them.Bezos' father isn't an outlier.Across the globe, the ultra-rich are turning their family offices — once discreet administrative hubs for accountants and lawyers — into sophisticated investment engines.And they're hiring seasoned financiers from Goldman Sachs, Morgan Stanley, and private equity firms to run them.The family office goes corporateFamily offices — the private firms that manage a family's investments, philanthropy, and legacy — used to be sleepy operations run by tax lawyers and estate planners."When I started, family offices were run by retired estate lawyers," said Kosnitzky, who has focused on family offices for more than 20 years. "That was ridiculous — lawyers aren't businesspeople, and trusts-and-estates lawyers are the worst.""They thought what a family office needs is someone who knows about wealth. It's not," he added."What they need are people who understand investments, who can manage platform and club investing, and manage the personnel. These are not lawyers."Now, many family offices look more like boutique hedge funds or private-equity firms.They make direct investments, co-invest with other families, and set up their own venture and real-estate vehicles."They're snapping up investment bankers and fund managers," Kosnitzky said. "They want to be compensated like fund managers."The data backs him up.According to JPMorgan's 2024 Global Family Office Report, 50% of family offices globally have non-family members serving as CEOs or presidents, while that figure rises to 63% among family offices managing $1 billion or more in assets.The report describes this shift as part of a "broader professionalization" sweeping through the sector.The new reasons for hiring outsidersKosnitzky said the shift reflects a fundamental change in how the rich think about risk.He identified three forces accelerating the trend.First, a wave of liquidity events — from IPOs to business sales — has flooded ultrawealthy families with cash to manage.Second, a younger generation of billionaires, often self-made and tech-savvy, prefers to invest directly rather than hand their money to banks.And third, many families are teaming up to invest in startups and private ventures — a model known as "club investing.""They don't want to pay the carried interest to some third party," Kosnitzky said. "They don't want to deal with conflicts of interest. They say, 'I can do this myself.'"Indeed, 73% of family offices say they have now implemented formal governance structures, such as boards of directors or investment committees, to manage their growing complexity, according to JPMorgan's report.Why CEOs from Wall Street fit the jobRunning a family office, however, requires more than financial savvy.It's…

TKArmy Maj. Joel AndersonUS Army soldiers are working with developers to refine the service's new command and control system in real time.NGC2 is a software-driven command-and-control system now being tested through a series of Army exercises.Soldiers are getting fixes overnight rather than in six months, officials said.The US Army is rushing to close the dangerous gap between how fast technology evolves and how slowly the military usually moves.The service's Next Generation Command and Control (NGC2) system is being developed with soldiers and developers fixing problems in real time instead of waiting months for upgrades, Army officials said.It's a different, faster approach to developing weapons than the service is used to; it's a process officials said is essential for preparing the Army for a potential high-intensity future conflict.NGC2, has been a leading new development in the Army's broader transformation initiative that's focused on new weapons and technologies like uncrewed capabilities and artificial intelligence, and the service is leaning hard on soldier feedback for faster development."What soldiers are really enjoying is having the ability to talk to the developers," Maj. Gen. Patrick Ellis, commanding general of the Army's 4th Infantry Division, told reporters at a recent media roundtable.Ellis said that while industry likes this setup, the soldiers really like it because it's not the usual "I've offered my opinion, and six months later another engineering release comes out.""It's much more a case of, 'I've offered my opinion, and tomorrow, what I asked you to fix has now been fixed,'" he said.TKUS Army photo by Pvt. Jacob CruzEllis said soldiers and developers have been in constant conversation about how to use this new technology during the Army's Ivy Sting exercises at Fort Carson, Colorado. The Army has completed two rounds of testing so far, with a third set for next month and a larger event next year that will pit NGC2 against simulated cyber and electronic warfare threats.Each Ivy Sting has seen incremental upgrades to NGC2, including the number of Howitzers connected, the use of drones to provide intelligence, surveillance, and reconnaissance feeds, AI models for identifying targets, and more diversified systems for commanders to make decisions.NGC2 marks a major shift from the command and control technologies the Army has long relied on. It's a more centralized system relying on open architecture, data, and software. The development team behind it, including Anduril, Palantir, and other companies, has been working with the Army on its specific capabilities.Ellis said that the Army is staying deeply involved in the project from start to finish, rather than serving as a temporary stop for contractors who build something and move on.Army leadership has been emphasizing the need for a new approach to buying, developing, and fielding weapons, as well as more collaborative relationships with industry partners. They're prioritizing agile and adaptive development of new systems, a more Silicon Valley approach.TKUS Army photo by Pvt. Jacob CruzJoe Welch, the Army executive overseeing the NGC2 program, said the system is one example of a "totally different relationship with industry than what we have previously been doing within our historic acquisitions," noting the service's goal to avoid past pitfalls and build technology that can be updated and improved quickly.Getting input from soldiers into the development of new technologies isn't new, but there's an effort to move faster as warfare evolves. For instance, that feedback has been useful in the swift development of the Army's Mid-Range Capability, or Typhon, missile system.During an exercise in the Philippines earlier last year, soldiers tweaked Typhon in the field, reducing reload time and stress on its components. User input was collected during and after the deployment in the region.In a report earlier this year, the Government Accountability Office, a…

Brandon Bell/Getty ImagesThis post originally appeared in the BI Today newsletter.You can sign up for Business Insider's daily newsletter here.Welcome back! Would you "rough it in the woods" to find clarity? That's what one millennial did when she went to a weekend sleepaway camp. The women she met there completely changed her perspective on aging.On the agenda:These twins' lives were identical until one got colon cancer at 21.The best skincare routine and products for men, according to two dermatologists.Gen Zers are leaving the white-collar world to work for billionaires.A neuroscientist is training to become a super-ager with six daily habits.But first: You don't have to fly this holiday season. There's another way.If this was forwarded to you, sign up here. Download Business Insider's app here.This week's dispatchAll aboard!Joey Hadden/Business InsiderIf your family group chat is anything like mine, you've already considered just staying put this holiday season. With the airports reeling after mass delays and cancellations due to the government shutdown, it's not looking pretty — even though the shutdown has lifted.What if I reminded you that there's another way? BI's travel reporter, Joey Hadden, has spent more than 75 hours on Amtrak's trains, including short- and long-distance routes and overnight trains, reviewing them for comfort, amenities, and even food.With different rail lines crossing the country — whether you're traveling north to south or east to west — you don't have to compromise comfort (albeit a few bumps!) to avoid airport headaches.In fact, one of Hadden's favorite ways to travel is by overnight train in an Amtrak roomette or bedroom. Her $400 roomette ticket included "a private enclosed space with two chairs, two beds, and perks such as priority boarding, meals on board, a dedicated attendant, and access to lounges at select stations." For an extra cost, a bedroom offers even more space.Before you book — and yes, I checked, there are still rooms available — here are a few things to keep in mind. Hadden notes that WiFi can be spotty, so if you need to stay connected throughout, you may want to consider a backup plan. Also, train food isn't as bad as it sounds, and some of Hadden's meals came with three courses.And a little tip from Hadden before you go: "If you can think of the train ride as part of the journey, you'll find it much more enjoyable."When your identical twin gets cancerKim Raff for BIBrinlee and Mariela Luster are identical twins who once shared everything. They went to the same college and studied the same major, and even their parents sometimes struggled to tell their voices apart.When Brinlee got colon cancer at 21, Mariela was the first to notice that something was wrong. As Brinlee's diagnosis changed the trajectory of her early 20s, Mariela's life stayed on track — but she shouldered the guilt of moving forward.A tale of two sisters.Skincare, simplifiedGetty ImagesMore men are opting for cosmetic procedures, like fillers and eyelid lifts, while overlooking something simpler: a daily skincare routine. Because most skincare products are aimed at women, many men are overwhelmed by the options, Dr. Peter Bittar told BI.Bittar and Dr. Corey L. Hartman, who are both board-certified dermatologists, shared the best routine for men, keeping it as simple as possible to achieve clear, soft, and youthful skin.Best routine for beginners.Gen Z's hottest new gigGetty Images; Alyssa Powell/BIAs layoffs rip through the white-collar world, many young people are turning to "private staffing." The jobs are about making the fabulous lives of the wealthy more lavish — think nannies, personal chefs, personal assistants, and the like.Working for the superrich is a more attractive alternative to climbing the increasingly wobbly corporate ladder. But working for a billionaire can also be nerve-racking.If you can't beat 'em, pamper 'em.Super habits for super-agersGetty ImagesIt's a popular misconception that…